.....
Fatum, you want me to return to Singapore and cane you
upside-down till you get it, izzit?! 
Self-destructive and self-sabotaging behaviour does elicit some
sympathy in the beginning, but it does nothing to solve
problems.
Told you so often liao, just let yourself mourn the loss, give
yourself a mourning period, and then move on.
It's scary how idealistic you are. All of us have dreams
and all of us make plans, but when things don't happen as we want
them to, sure we get broken-hearted and disappointed, but we pick
ourselves up and we decide on alternative courses of action, and we
move on, chin up, simply because life will always throw lemons at
you at some stage. And I'm sure you've heard of that cliche
"If life gives you lemons, make lemonade." blah blah!
The plans you have enforced allow no margin for error, for
changes, for nature to take its course. You just can't
regiment your life that rigidly! You can't keep mistakes,
disappointments, and failure at bay just by making elaborate and
detailed plans!
Live life, and ride the waves of life, ebb and flow, rise and
fall... It's life to embrace it all and come out of it a
Survivor. You can't invest in some 'rock-solid' boat and plan
on having utterly no waves in the sea of life.
